Adulting in general means growing up. Seems so simple yet very exhausting most of the time. Honestly, i still cant believe that i am actually going through this phase cause damn my height is like 10yo kid, my mental age is like a 14yo while my age is turning 25 in just a month. It is so hard tryna cope with this reality, i just wanna be a kid again without any of this dumb responsibilities in life. There are times when i just question how does all this "adult" enjoy their adulting life cause damn it is sooo freakin exhausting and frustrating for me. Ngl, you circle will get so much smaller, your responsibilities got bigger, your are broke all the damn time no matter how much you have in your saving account. Gosh if i can list out all of the negativity of growing up (adulting), the list will go on and on and on and on and on. Oh. forget to mentioned how we are in a freakin PANDEMIC *frustrated emoji* arrrghhhhh.
But despite that, we still live. I am still breathing, still moving on. If anyone ever ask me about dying, yea i might have though about it once or twice but never would i implement in my life. No matter how sick the world actually is, no matter how tough it could be. People are still surviving just to have that bits of life they dream to have. I cant believe that i wished i could grow up faster back when i was a kid, if i could go back and turn the time, imma punch myself HAHAHA. Nothing about adulting is fun at all, but i have to give credit for a fact that when you are an "adult" you will have the benefit of its own. You get to make your own decision, you get to live life, you get to see things in a wider perspective and you can explore more. The more you grow, the more you knew and thats just freakin addictive for some reason. You cant help but to crave for more despite any effort you have and you give, you wanted change despite knowing it is impossible. You will go through all these emotional and physical damage yet you still stayed. Thats just what adulting will do to you until you find the purpose of your life.
Talk about purpose, it will always change over the time. The moment your status in life changed, your purpose will eventually change too. Im still single now so my priorities will be about me and my family but once you have kids and partners, bruhh that will definitely change. your goals might change and your view towards life will change lol. Now talk about that, i still cant grasp how the fact that literally everyone that i knew in life is just either getting engaged, getting married and even have kids. Dont get me wrong, i loveeeeeeeeee seeeing all of that and im soooo soooo happy for them. But it feels like as if we were living in two different world. Like how do yall can just decide about marriage when i cant even decide what to eat for lunch ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ it is just surreal to be living in this adulting phase hahaha. But trust me, im happy for everyone that is moving one step in their life. It kinda feels reassuring that everyone get their shits together smh.
Seeing how i am writing this, im always back and forth about adulting. I do enjoy it but its a freakin hell to go through. But in the end, if you are able to get that glimples of happiness, yall will stuck through this cycle for the rest of your life. It's so hard to live through it but you do it anyway, you suck it up and just live your life in the best way you can actually do. There are days you might just wanna die in your bed, but you will survive it. There are day when adulting seems so enjoyable but shits will fall back on you, yet you will get through it. You kinda hate it but secretly hoping it will work out for you in the end. That is what adulting feels like to me, its soo addictive that you wont even realize it. Until you find that peace and stability that you crave for, keep on living cause you are that worthy of going through this phase. Take a break once in a while but never give up. It's your life and you owe it to yourself and no one else can take that away from you.
That is all from me, the adulting anis in 2022. Hug and kisses to all that is going through this era. I wished and prayed that everyone is in good health and is protected. Hug and kisses.
Love anis xoxo 💓
